Life's Persistent Questions

(with a nod to Guy Noir)

One Mother's Persistent Questions about Life

1. Why. Are. Children. SO. Loud?

2. Is calm, detached parenting even possible? Do the "experts" who recommend it have children?

3. Will a pre-teen truly die of embarrassment if someone sees the traces of un-rubbed-in sunscreen on his face?

4. Is screaming at kids really all that bad? Isn't it possible, what with the way parenting advice evolves, that a generation from now, the new best practices in parenting will include screaming early and often, thus demonstrating that I was way ahead of the curve back in 2011?

5. Do I have the kind of kids who will grow up to be geniuses, who will make important contributions to the quality of human life, in spite of spending way too much time in front of TV and computer screens? Oooo, let's hope so.

6. Is it fair to characterize the parent-teen relationship as one of mutually perceived intentional torture?

7. When four of my kids suddenly need new soccer cleats all at the same time, does this mean I am being punished for some misdeed? It feels like that's what that means. And isn't there some other way for me to atone for my sins besides shelling out a gazillion dollars on shoes I don't get to wear?

8. When it comes right down to it, which one will I choose: coffee or my health?

9. Do you need to have "the talk" with one of your kids? This one I have an answer for! Well, Julia Sweeney does, and it's probably more of a cautionary tale than a how to, but well worth the watching, so here you go:

For my part, I will carry on and keep up the search for answers to life's mysteries. The search is at least half the fun, right?

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