Kelly Corrigan, on illness

Kelly Corrigan has done it again: written something that resonates loudly and beautifully.

Take a moment to click through and read what she has to say about illness and what it wants from us.  She has indeed made herself useful with her words:

Click here to continue reading.

Thank you Kelly!

* * *

Don't Miss This Opportunity

Yesterday, I found out why I've been experiencing muscle pain and muscle fatigue for the past several months: turns out I have a pretty severe Vitamin D deficiency.  How delightful that my inability to move is not a character flaw!  How delightful is health insurance!  How delightful that, with Vitamin D supplements on board, my children might remember me for something besides collapsing on my pillows!  I am so looking forward to feeling better.

This discovery is a good reminder that we should listen to our bodies.  I've been ignoring my collection of symptoms for a long, long time, assuming that it was just a matter of not getting enough rest, or just because I'm getting older, or just not important enough to pay attention to.  I would never have ignored the ongoing, chronic aches and pains of one of my children; why was I willing to ignore my own?

Think about your own body: are you ignoring anything that you maybe should give a little credence to?  Anything worth asking a doctor about?  Anything worth feeling better for?  Don't miss this opportunity.

* * *

Yesterday, I read a New Yorker essay by Roger Angell* that moved me to tears.  (Updated: The link will take you to full article; The New Yorker posted it in its entirety today.)  So much of my day is occupied by keeping up with my computer and responding to my smart phone that I think some of those tears were due to spending a few minutes with the slick, weighted pages of a good magazine, but most of them were because Angell's writing is exquisite.  His ability to weave back and forth between the personal and the universal is captivating.  I miss reading and I miss writers, and I can't wait to read more and more and more.  Why and how did I ever lose that habit?

Think about your nightstand: does it hold books and magazines you have been meaning to read? Are you making time for Downton and Duck Dynasty but putting off Didion, Diaz or Dos Passos?  Is there anything there worth spending time with?  Don't miss this opportunity.

* * *

Yesterday, while I was ranting on Facebook about mistakenly buying cilantro instead of parsley and being severely disappointed that I couldn't make the dinner I was planning, a family in San Diego was mourning the loss of a 20 year old son, killed while skateboarding by a young drunk driver who fled the scene.  I heard about it, mere moments after my silly FB post, from a friend of mine who knows the family.

There aren't really words for losing a child.  It's too painful to imagine or express.  So many things are unimportant, so many daily annoyances and inconveniences distract us from what really matters.  I read the article about the family: there was a photo of 7 or 8 of them, gathered on the beach facing a makeshift memorial of balloons and flowers.  They stood in a group, shoulder to shoulder, leaning and holding on to each other, keeping each other upright in their grief.  One of them was missing.  One of the people who belonged there was not there, could not help with the holding.

Think about your family and friends: who belongs there?  Are any of them missing?  Can you go grab one and hold him up for awhile?  Can one of them do the same for you?  Do you need to leave aside minor annoyances and tell someone you love them?  Don't miss this opportunity.

* * *  



*Thank you Kelly Corrigan, for the Twitter recommendation for Angell's essay.

You Saved Us, San Francisco

San Francisco, you saved us all.  You granted a wish, and gave an unfathomable gift to one little boy and to the thousands and thousands of people who watched his dream come true.

For anyone who may have been under a rock, or God forbid working, today, for anyone who missed the feel-good story of a lifetime, for anyone who blubbers like a giant size softie on a soggy waffle cone (because I fall in that latter category), this story is for you.

Text below shamelessly lifted from the SF Make A Wish Foundation's website:

Today, Miles is getting his wish of becoming Batkid! Miles may only be 5 years old but he is fighting a very adult battle. Miles has leukemia. He is a bright, positive, little boy who finds inspiration in super-heroes. Miles told Make-A-Wish he wanted to be Batkid, and today is his big day! 

The day begins with a breaking news story. San Francisco’s Police Chief asks if anyone knows the whereabouts of Batkid. The city needs his help to fight crime and capture villains! Our little Batkid, along with Batman, is ready to answer the call. 

As part of his special day, Batkid is driving around San Francisco in his Batmobile, and his adventures include rescuing a damsel-in-distress from cable-car tracks, capturing the Riddler in the act of robbing a downtown vault, and rescuing the San Francisco mascot Lou Seal from the clutches of The Penguin. The day’s final stop is at City Hall where Mayor Ed Lee congratulates Miles on his daring feats of justice and presents him with a key to the city.

(Visit that website linked above.  Heck I'll link it here too.  Tons of additional info on Miles' milestone day, including a tweet from Obama.)

SF natives are falling all over themselves to express their pride and their jubilation over their gorgeous, big-hearted City making this happen.  I shall join them: Batkid stole my heart and left it in San Francisco, where it rightfully belongs.  I cannot rest my head on my pillow tonight without thanking first and foremost the Make A Wish Foundation, not only for granting that kid one hell of a wish but for giving the rest of us a gift we didn't even know we needed.  And there are more people and organizations to thank:

To the San Francisco Chronicle for printing the special edition newspaper…

To the lamborghini owner who let Batkid ride around in a real life Batmobile…

To the awesome Batman escort, who ushered Batkid around SF/Gotham for the entire day and who, among other things, helped Batkid catapult over a vault and do a complete flip into a waiting cushion...

To all of the members of the SFPD, for being Miles' official hosts, and specifically to the SF policeman who put a huge "KAPOW!" sign on the front of his motorcycle…

To the banks and hotels who adorned their Gotham City skyscrapers with Batman symbols…

To the Lou Seal and the San Francisco Giants…

To the wonderful souls who played the parts of the damsel in distress, the Riddler, and the Penguin...

To the thousands of people who cheered and wept and whooped and hollered, and watched SF Mayor Ed Lee thank Miles for saving Gotham…

All I can say is thank you from the bottom of my tear-soaked heart.  This has been a very, very, very good day for humankind.

It sounds so damn trite to say it, but there's no way around it: Wishes can come true.  And when they do for a little guy like Miles, it's just impossible not to feel the swelling joy, the sweet relief, the certain faith that all is right in this crazy, broken world.

Now we just need a Train tribute.  How about it, boys?

* * *

7 Quick Takes: Volume 49

It's Friday.
I'm frozen.
I'm frightful.

I'm free.

Please visit Jennifer, the host of 7QT, and visit the links to some of today's other Quick Takers.

~1~

Over a year ago, I decided to paint ceramic mugs for my kids as a gift for Christmas, 2010.  That December, I spent many hours painstakingly creating unique designs for each of them.  Christmas morning, they were delighted by the colorful, personalized cups...which were painted with the wrong paint.  In a few days, it was all rubbed off.

OK.  Lesson learned.  Get the right paint.  I promised the kids I would re-do them.  I never did.

Christmas 2011.  I bought more cups.  I bought some Ceramcoat paint, because I figured, based on the name, that this paint was good for ceramics.  I painted another couple of cups.  I realized quickly this was also the wrong paint.  I gave up in disgust.

OK. Lesson learned.  ASK QUESTIONS.  So this time, when I went to Joann Fabrics, I asked someone to direct me to the right paint for ceramic mugs.  BINGO!  I got the right kind of paint.  I still haven't painted cups for the kids...yet...but I did one for my nephew for his birthday last week:

This was a ton of fun to do, and reminded me how much I need a creative outlet in my life.  To the children I gave birth to: I promise yours will be done by Easter!  ♥

~2~

Son #2's observation regarding Little T:

Mom, it's the strangest thing, but whenever I see Tallulah at school, she's calm, she's behaving, she's doing everything her teacher tells her to do.  She's not screaming or kicking or being wacky at all!

Yeah, well, that tells you a little bit what she can be like at home. 

~3~

But then again, this is also the child who said to me the other day:

Mommy, I want to thank you for four things.  Thank you for taking me to the park.  Thank you for taking off this bandaid and for taking off the other bandaid.  And thank you for making my dinner.

And the next day she gazed at me with a little smile and said: "Why is my mother so wonderful?"

What's a little kicking and screaming when it comes with words like that??

~4~

She also recently asked me, upon seeing a work crew digging a large hole on a street corner: "Are they burying a dead body?"

Methinks it's time to monitor the 5-year old's media intake a little bit more closely.

~5~

In honor of Valentine's Day coming, I'd like to recommend a very little, but very lovely book for young children.  This is one of our favorites:

So sweet.  Plus, the little girl in the story has perhaps one of the greatest all time little girl story names ever: Cornelia Augusta.  Love that.

~6~

You know what I love about my 7 year old?  When she is yammering away and talking a blue streak and when I think I can't take it anymore, I can look at her and say: "OK, stop talking now."  And she laughs.  And she stops talking.  And she doesn't get upset.

My wish for every mother in the world is a child with a temperament like hers.

~7~

A friend of mine sent me a text last night with a bit of advice for getting through my day.  I was expressing my concern to her about how I was going to shepherd my kids through the process of doing homework, doing chores, making and eating dinner, and showering and getting ready for the morrow.  She sent me an Act of Faith from a book she has called Small Steps for Catholic Moms:

Instead of focusing on the outcomes of your activities today, focus simply on your state of soul as you do them.  As you work, don't sin.

Those few words shifted my perspective on what my family needed to do.  And since I'm not afraid of the word "sin" -- don't we all do things we wish we hadn't done, especially when it comes to our children? -- I was able to read those words and focus differently on the evening that lay ahead of me.

Let's hope I remember them again today.

* * *

Dorothy Saves Christmas

I readily admit that the Christmas season kicks my butt.

I get overwhelmed by the pressure of it all, saddened by the consumerism, frustrated by the greed, and worried about spending the money.

Tis' the Season to completely freak out.

But this year, I felt myself compelled to seek out an old friend, a book, actually, by a personal hero of mine, Dorothy Day. The book is The Long Loneliness, and I picked it up this morning and started re-reading it.

"We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community." --Dorothy Day

If I stay with these pages, I think I'll make it to the Epiphany in fine form. Thank you Dorothy.

* * *

7 Quick Takes: Volume 45

~1~

This week marked the birthday of Dorothy Day, one of my personal heroes and saints.  So this first take is devoted to her.  She said:

The greatest challenge of the day is: 

how to bring about a revolution of the heart, a revolution 

which has to start with each one of us?

In the midst of the Occupy movements happening all over the country, this question is more relevant than ever.

I have two books to recommend in honor of Dorothy's birthday.  The first is hers, The Long Loneliness, a wonderful, spiritually uplifting book about her conversion, her life and her work.  The second is the book The Life You Save May Be Your Own: An American Pilgrimage, by Paul Elie.  Described by its publisher as "the story of four modern American Catholics who made literature out of their search for God," this engaging book weaves together the biographies of Dorothy Day, Flannery O'Connor, Walker Percy, and Thomas Merton.  I received this book as a gift years ago, and although it's been awhile since I read it, it remains a well-loved favorite.  If not for my wonderful husband and five beautiful children (so, if not for my entire life), I would run off to live a life like these four people did: part social activist, part hermit contemplative, all writer.

Both books are well worth your time and your brain.

* * *

And that's the only important take I've got today.  The rest are silly little things my kids did and said this week, and a couple of odds and ends:

~2~

Son: "Mom, can a marriage survive without dishonesty?"

Mom: "You mean without honesty."

Son, with twinkle in eye: "No, I mean dishonesty.  Can a marriage survive without it?"

Mom:  "Remind me to be less sarcastic with my next family."

Because clearly, it's too late with this one.

~3~

Son, looking at an animal encyclopedia: "MOM!  Did you know there's such a thing as a SPERM WHALE?"

And before mom can answer, he runs out of the room to find his brother and shouts: "I KNOW WHY THAT WHALE IS NAMED MOBY DICK!  BECAUSE HE'S A SPERM WHALE!!!!!"

~4~

No words needed.  And none could I find.

~5~

Late one night, just as I was drifting off to bed, I heard the alarm on my son's phone go off.

BREEP BREEP, breep breep.  BREEP BREEP, breep breep.    BREEP BREEP, breep breep.  BREEP BREEP, breep breep.  BREEP BREEP, breep breep.  BREEP BREEP, breep breep.  BREEP BREEP, breep breep.  

The darn thing doesn't stop until someone presses the OK button.  And this has happened before.  Once, the phone was right next to him, and it woke up his brother, but not him, and his poor brother didn't know how to turn it off and was tormented by it for 15 minutes before he came and got me.  (And yes, I suggested that next time he wake up his brother, and not me.)

This time, the phone was in the living room, and neither boy heard it.  But I did, even though I was upstairs.  Disgusted, I threw the warm blankets off, and stormed downstairs in righteous indignation.  What is so important that he needs to set an alarm for this hour?  I picked up the phone and gave the OK button a vigorous, annoyed poke.  And then saw the event that was important enough for him to set an alarm:  Mom's Birthday.

Oh.  OK.  That's worth it.  Except he slept through it.  But it's the thought that counts.  I guess.

~6~

We went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium this week.  What an amazing place.  My favorites sighting?  The Leafy Sea Dragon!  This creature is, I think, the single most amazing living thing I've ever laid eyes on:

I want to be this guy!

I made the boys super mad at me right before we left the house that morning by telling them they could not bring their ipods.  Call me crazy, but I sort of wanted to have a shared experience, even of the driving time, and wasn't interested in watching them bury their faces in electronic devices and plugging their ears with headphones.  So we had a high grump factor as we began our day.  But then, we listened to the story From the Mixed Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler during the car trip, both directions, and lo and behold, they all loved it.  This is a great story, so I guess I'm offering up a second Recommended Reading (or Listening).

The day was great.  The traffic at the tail end nearly killed me.  I can't wait to go back.

~7~

My youngest asked me this week: "Mommy, how does a person come from another person if the person the new person comes from is already in the world?"

Translation: how are babies made?

I think she was confused because we had been talking a few days earlier about how we all come from God.  So she's thinking something like: "Wait.  A baby comes from God?  I thought a baby comes from a mommy.  And a mommy is here, not in Heaven with God.  So what's the deal with that?"

I told her that it's kind of like planting a seed, and that God (!) plants that seed inside a mommy, and then the baby grows from there.  She said:

"I don't get it."

I tried again with basically the same idea.  She said:

"I don't get it!  How does a plant become a person?"

I tried to explain that the seed in question is not a plant seed, that it's a person seed.  She said:

"Whatever.  Can I have some candy?"

Yes, sweet Jesus, yes!

* * *

Please visit the 7 Quick Takes host at Conversion Diary, follow a few links to other Quick Takers, and throw out a comment or two.

* * *

7 Quick Takes: Volume 44

I don't care if Monday's blue • Tuesday's grey and Wednesday too • Thursday I don't care about you • It's Friday, I'm in love.

And it's Friday, I'm writing Quick Takes.

~1~

Time to say goodbye to our 2011 Birthday Season!  Every Fall, we have 4 kid birthdays in 6 week.  The last one was a few weeks ago, but the party is officially tonight.  I am hosting four little girl guests for a sleepover.  There will be pizza.  There will be face painting.  There will be movie watching.  There will be cake.

There will be a tired mommy at the end.

Hopefully, there will be a happy 7 year old at the end, too.

And thus endeth the AIRY5 2011 birthdays.  If I start planning now, maybe the 2012 birthday season will go a bit more smoothly.

~2~

And this great advice letter made the rounds on Facebook this week; I've seen it before (it's been around since 2007), maybe you have too, but certainly, it's worth another read or two or ten.

Thankfully, I have no friends who have ever expressed the ignorance of the letter writer, who basically admits that she doesn't understand what a stay at home mother does all day or why a stay at home mother has less time for other people.  I've never heard someone be so blunt and clueless about the subject before.  So it's not really the in-your-face, take-that quality of Carolyn Hax's response that I enjoy, although that is pretty delightful.  Rather, it's the reminder to me of what I do all day long.  It's easy to forget what we moms are doing here, raising kids and such.  Stay at home dads (HM) too.  Anyway, everyone should read this, especially if you are in the trenches, wiping butts and noses, cleaning messes, doing laundry, negotiating toddler peace deals, and wondering where you put your sense of humor.

~3~

Obligatory halloween costume photos.

Jessie

Andy Samberg, Random Clown, Judy Jetson

Pajama Girl

~4~

I ♥ Stephen Colbert.  And Michael Pollan.  And food.  So this video clip?  Is golden.

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Michael Pollan
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog Video Archive

~5~

If you live in the Bay Area, and you like nurseries and finding lovely native plants to stick in your garden, there is a little out of the way nursery you really must visit.  Native Here Nursery, which is part of the California Native Plant Society, is a fantastic small nursery located in Tilden Park.  Going to visit is like stepping into another world.  It's quiet and woodsy.  The plants are healthy and inviting.  You'll feel like you stumbled upon a well-kept secret.  And you can combine the trip with a hike in Tilden Park and a visit to the Botanic Gardens.  

You really must go.  

~6~

My kitchen, this morning.  Kid X turned around and shouted at Kid Y, for no reason:  "YOU'RE DUMB!"

Five minutes later, Kid Y walks into the living room and whacks Kid X, who responds with incredulity.  

Mom: "Well, if you shout at someone and tell them they are dumb, you should expect them to be unhappy with you.  It's not surprising she would lash out at you."

Kid X: "Oh come on.  That was five whole minutes ago.  And she already hit me for that!"

Oh, well, in that case, it makes no sense whatsoever.  

Sigh.  Kid logic makes me crazy.

~7~

And one more little Halloween gem for your enjoyment.  This Shouts and Murmurs column appeared in the Oct. 24th 2011 New Yorker magazine.   I think you will enjoy it.

* * *

Please go visit Conversion Diary, the host of 7 Quick Takes, visit the links of 7 Quick Takers playing along, and through out some comments.

* * * 

Two Letters to Kids Who Play Soccer

The first one is not from me. This letter, which I wish I could photocopy and pass out to every parent on the four teams my family is a part of -- or at least to a few hand-selected parents on those teams, was written by Mike Woitalla, a coach with our own East Bay United and the Executive Editor of Soccer America.

If you have kids who play any sport, not just soccer, you should read and share this letter, addressed to Soccer-Playing Children of America. It's really quite wonderful, exemplifying as it does all of our best hopes for what the beautiful game can be for our kids.

Mr. Woitalla's words have been resounding in my head all weekend, as Rick and I split our time between four teams and three tournaments. But as the weekend wore on, and I found myself cajoling sibling spectators into their booster seats for the kajillionth time and laundering uniforms in the middle of the night and dashing to the store for more (some would say better) snacks, other thoughts started pinging around as well, so I composed a letter of my own. It's sort of a complement to Mr. Woitalla's letter...I hope. Read on, dear children:

Dear Soccer-Playing Children in My Family,

This was a wonderful weekend of playing soccer, in sun and shadow, in early mornings and late afternoons. We saw everything from you this weekend, running, dribbling, passing, fighting, scoring, assisting, scissoring, weaving, winning, tying, and losing with dignity. I hope you had fun out there, just like Mr. Woitalla hopes for you as well. I want you to read his letter to you. He expresses eloquently everything your father and I believe in our hearts about soccer and your participation in it. And after you've read it, read this one. These are just a few extra gems that are also important, and equally held dear by dad and me.

First, you've been doing a decent job this season of finding your socks, shorts, and jerseys the day before your game. It's not easy, but I'm proud of you for not giving up, even when you've been sitting in a heap on your bedroom floor for 10 whole minutes moaning that you can't find one of your socks. So far, you've fought through those struggles and come up with the elusive sock. To that effort, I would add one small thing: I hope when it comes time to leave the house for your field next weekend, you've got your shoes on and your water bottles filled. This is so important, and it will help set you up to have a fantastic game. Because if you don't, I'm probably going to scream at you out of sheer frustration, and screaming at you is definitely not a great way to send you off onto the pitch.

And you know how your siblings have been coming to your games for years and figuring out how to keep themselves entertained during long tournament weekends? You know how the little ones have learned that when mom and dad are intently watching a soccer game, twitching with every move, they're aren't ignoring their younger offspring, they're just really, really pulling for whichever sibling is out there? You know how we've been telling them for years, in the car on the way to your games, that someday it will be their turn? Well, that day is here, at least for one of them. So yes, you have to go to some of her games and even watch and even cheer and even pretend to be supportive. It's the least you can do. If you're looking for the least, I'm handing it to you on a silver platter. Sit. Watch. Cheer once in a while. Easy peasy.

And another thing: early mornings really do suck. I know it's tough to get out of bed at 6am to get dressed and out the door to a 7am warm up. You know what's even harder? Getting out of bed before you do, at 5:30am, in order to make coffee for the coach, fix a warm protein-packed breakfast for lots of short people, make sure all the uniforms are clean and ready, and then get 5 reluctant risers to get ready for the day. All with a smile and an encouraging word or two. As much as I love the beautiful game, I also loved my beautiful pillow this morning, and yet I left it in order to be the force behind getting everyone where they needed to be.

Remember, the game is the thing. The game is why we do this. I know you love it, and I love watching you do what you love. A little reminder, then: We do not play this game for cheap knock-off neon-green Messi sweatshirts that look like they were slapped together in someone's garage and then hung on an old curtain rod sporting a $35 price tag. We definitely don't do it for that, and this half of we would really love it if you could let go of the prospect of owning that cheap piece of crap and focus on the game at hand.

Oh, and on a related note: not every ice cream vendor needs our business. The earth will not stop spinning if you don't eat ice cream at every soccer field your magical cleated feet grace. In other words, you are not a professional athlete, and you are not paid in ice cream.

We, your loving parents, will cheer and cheer, and try not to scream or coach from the sidelines (except your dad, when he actually is your coach, and even then, not during the game itself), and in return, we'd really appreciate it if you could recognize who it is that gets you to your games, buys your cleats, your uniforms, your shin guards, your balls, your power bars, your mangoes and your gatorade, drives to your practices, replaces your lost water bottle (well, once at least: after that, you're on your own), drives back to the field well after dark to see if your forgotten ball is still there, and generally gives up life itself to make this game possible for you.

I've told you before: I'm 100% willing and happy to do all of these things because if you love this game, then you should play it, as much as possible and as well as possible. What am I asking for? Work with me. That's it. Just work with me. Show good sportsmanship with me too, your mama, the captain of the team, so to speak, and the only person on earth who cares as much as you do about how your team does and whether or not you have a good game.

I care. So please don't piss me off.

Love,

Mom

ps: I think your father, coach-extraordinaire, more devoted to soccer than anyone you have ever met or ever will, could write a letter of his own. Maybe he will someday. Between all of your practices and games, I doubt he'll have the time. So on his behalf, let me just say this: Never forget how much time, energy, and love he puts into planning and thinking about you and how you are experiencing soccer. No one has or ever will do more for you, when it comes to soccer, than he does. We tease him that he can make soccer a metaphor for anything, but he's right, isn't he? Soccer is just like life: love and hard work will take you far. You dad will always be there watching, hoping, and cheering for you. So go forth to love and play hard.

So Close

Day 29.

Each day in August, I have posted on this blog. It hasn't been nearly as difficult as I thought it would be. I guess I hadn't considered the endless fodder that my family generates on a daily basis.

But tonight, with 19 minutes left on the 29th day, I am absolutely wrenching myself away from my book in order to put this post up, so that on Thursday morning, I can say that I did it, I posted every day for one month.

I'm reading Unbroken, by Laura Hillenbrand. I only have a handful of pages left. Unable to put the book down, I've lost sleep and as a result, lost patience with my children. I've neglected my laundry, my house, my offspring. I told my 4 year old I would not read to her tonight, so intent on this book have I been. It has all been worth it.

A fabulous book.

And I leave you with that.

* * *

7 Quick Takes: Volume 36

Another Friday's come around,

We've made it here both safe and sound.

Glad you're here with me and mine,

Would you like a glass of wine?

I've had several, so up you catch!

And help me with a plan to hatch.

Find a way (or find some elves)

To make the children raise themselves.

So I can spend my days and nights

On silly fun and fancy flights.

On making life an endless game--

Oh wait--my kids already do the same!

Pull up a chair and share a toast

And visit our 7 Quick Takes host.

Visit the others playing along,

And may your weekend be a song.

~1~

Soccer season starts this weekend with a bang: three kids are in tournaments, which means we have 9 games minimum, and 12 if their teams all do well.

I think I will encourage Little T to take up knitting as a sport.

~2~

I just started a great new book: Unbroken, by Laura Hillenbrand. She also wrote Seabiscuit, although I have not read that. I'm only on page 25 and I am really enjoying it. The subtitle is: "A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption."

Usually, I read only fiction. But I've wanted to change that, and when a friend recommended this book to me the other day and put it directly into my hand to borrow, I was thrilled.

Have any of you read it? And/or: what's your favorite non-fiction book?

~3~

I am still adding to my list of movies to use during our new homeschooling year. My friend Nicole gave me another great idea today: Miracle. Thanks Nic!

Please, share your ideas for great family movies. They can be educational in nature, or pure fun, like the original Parent Trap. We will be watching one movie per school week on our crappy TV, and I'm hoping this will be a highlight of the year. And if anyone out there wants to buy me a flat screen TV, purely to enhance my kids' educational experience of course, I am totally open to that.

Also, let me know if you'd like to receive a copy of my List Of Super Awesome Movies For Homeschoolin' Families or For Peeps Who Just Like To Watch Movies, once it's finalized.

~4~

Another homeschooling milestone reached! Lady E ran into the garage today, where I was failing at yet another attempt at organizing chaos, and announced: "Mommy, Mommy! I finally learned how to arm fart!"

She even offered to give me a tutorial, complete with things she tried that failed. That's the beauty of education: sharing what we've learned with others.

I get a little teary just thinking about it.

~5~

There is a brand spankin' new Safeway in my neighborhood. It is gigantic. It is fancy. It has a sushi bar. It has a Starbucks. It has cafe seating. It's decor is all chocolate and mocha. It has hardwood-ish floors in the produce section. It has new disco mini-carts.

I hate it.

It's way too big and takes forever to get through. It's freezing in there. The dairy section is in a different zip code than the produce department. They now have 4,322 different kinds of cereal instead of 3,457. And their deli still takes a kajillion years to make a sandwich. (I know of what I speak: my first job, which I had for four years of high school was in a deli, and I know how to make a damn good sandwich fast. My fingers itch when I order sandwiches at the Safeway deli. Silly me, I though it might be different with a fancy new facility. Not true.)

A Facebook friend of mine put it best when she posted the other day: "I miss my ghetto Safeway." So do I, Carol; so do I.

I do kinda like the disco mini-carts, though.

~5~

Note to self: do not let practically 5 year old children take naps. You will pay dearly for it come 11pm.

And wouldn't you think a mother of five would have learned that by now? It turns out that sleep is seductive, both for the sleeper and for the beneficiary of a sleeping monkey-tornado.

~6~

"Foods" that irritate me: Hot Pockets. Pizza Rolls. Danimals. Lunchables. Smores-Flavored Pepperidge Farm Goldfish. Really?

Just because you can do it doesn't mean it's a good idea. Really.

~7~

A goofy photo for your Friday. I hope this makes you smile.

* * *

Better

Last night, I sat down with a new book, Sarah's Key. Six and half hours later, at 3:30am, I finished it.

At about page 25, I wasn't sure I wanted to keep reading. It was already brutal. By page 50, I couldn't put it down, and knew that I'd read it in one sitting.

I am bleary-eyed, exhausted, and inhabiting another world today, suspended in the pages of Sarah's story, so beautifully written by Tatiana de Rosnay.

Reading that book makes me want to be better, a better mother, a better wife, a better friend, daughter, sister. I can't say why or how. It makes me want to be stronger and braver.

I stayed awake for another hour, not thinking coherently, but acutely aware of the yearning the book had stirred in me, and wondering about it.

Today, with the daily tasks of motherhood and family life ahead of me, with all of the chores I loathe needing to be done, and with not nearly enough sleep, I will strive to be better.

* * *

Mockingbird

I am reading To Kill A Mockingbird to my older kids. Originally, I gave it to my oldest to read on his own, but he asked me if I would read it with him, aloud. We started off just the two of us, but have been joined by the next oldest two, who can't stand anyone doing something that does not involve them.

However, my second oldest is clearly not engaged. His two comments during tonight's reading:

1. "Boo is a stupid name."

and

2. "Mom! This big speck of dust is attracted to my shirt!"

Apparently he was not so much listening to and enthralled by the story as he was playing with floating dust motes and watching them land on his shirt.

I am a reasonable woman. But if he fails to appreciate and adore To Kill a Mockingbird, I may have to put a bag over my head and walk the earth in the depths of failure and despair.

* * *

I am beginning to think that I need to give my children a list, a list of things and people they must love if they do not want to be disowned by me. Right now, I know that The Beatles and To Kill a Mockingbird are on the list. Dewars peanut butter chews are too. Mother Theresa. Someday, Guinness will be. I'm sure there are at least a few other thing that belong there too.

So do I make it an all or nothing list? Or can they reach a certain percentage and safely remain Good Standing Offspring? I'm considering.

* * *

On the other hand, another member of my audience is so enthralled by the story that he cannot sleep; we just finished the chapter where Jem goes back to the Radley place to retrieve his pants, and finds them folded and sewn up, waiting for him. My son was riveted, petrified, listening to that chapter. Now, at 12:23am, he can't sleep, as every shadow crossing his wall, every wind-stirred branch from the lemon tree at his window, is Boo Radley come to get him.

Now that's the way to read a story!

* * *

7 Quick Takes: Volume 23

Ah, Friday. I dare say I love you more than Robinson Crusoe does.

After a brief 7 Quick Takes hiatus, I have returned today with 7 bits of randomness. Please visit Jen at Conversion Diary, the host of 7 Quick Takes; check out the links to other people who are participating. This week, Jen is not writing her own, for reasons explained on her blog, but she has still made it possible for the rest of us to play along.

OK, here we go.

~ 1 ~

As I mentioned in yesterday's post, we just finished reading Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator. In case you are not familiar with this book, at the very end, the President of the United States invites Willy Wonka, Charlie, and Charlie's whole family to a big party at the White House, to thank them for their extraordinary service to the United States, rendered when they saved 136 people from certain death in an orbiting space hotel.

So my son says wistfully today:

"Wouldn't it be great if our family did something really special, and Obama invited us to The White House to thank us?"

pause

"But that won't happen, because we break stuff."

~ 2 ~

Fun Homeschooling Thing: When we started homeschooling this past September, I signed up for a few different list serve/email groups. Through one of them, I get a "History on the Go" email each month. It lists a historical, cultural or otherwise interesting fact for each day of the month. I have ignored these emails until this month, but finally printed January's and have been reading each day with the kids, which has been fun. Simple...easy...no big project...but fun and engaging. So far this month, we've talked about Betsy Ross and the first American flag (her birthday was January 1st), learned about why birds fly in a v-formation when they are migrating (January 5th was Migratory Bird Day), and made jokes that are only funny to grammar school kids about the fact that yesterday was Bean Day. We could have read Jack and the Beanstalk instead, but farting jokes were more appealing to most of the people in the room. Each entry in the calendar comes with a few ideas or links for activities you can do to explore the topic further.

I like the fact that these calendar items expose the kids to all kinds of different topics, from Elvis Presley being the first rock musician to be featured on a postage stamp (January 8th) to Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart being a child prodigy (January 27th). Sign up for this e-zine here. It's cool.

~ 3 ~

Seriously? I need some advice about how to get my kids to fight less and complain less. Or maybe someone can just tell me it's normal. But lately, I seem to reach that intolerance level awful darn quick, and then I usually spiral into some narration about how it's all my fault and if I were a better mother they might actually act like they like each other and if they keep on this path, they will all grow up to be mean, mean people. This is the first time I haven't shipped the kids back to school after Christmas Break, so perhaps that has something to do with it. But seriously? They are making me coo-coo for cocoa puffs. And I hate cocoa puffs.

Help.

~ 4 ~

Recommended mommy blog: Many of you have probably already discovered Mommyland, but woo-boy is this some funny stuff. If you are looking for a really funny, sarcastic, not-pollyana-ish take on motherhood, visit their site, Rants from Mommyland. Thoughtfully, they created a link called Is This the Right Blog for You? so you can figure out if you belong there. They also have a glossary, for all of the Mommyland Lingo you'll want to be up to speed on. Check them out and get ready to laugh.

~ 5 ~

My girls are physically incapable of giving me breathing room. As I type, the three of them are having a contest to see which one of them can achieve the highest percentage of body-to-body contact with me. They'll grow out of it, right? I will miss it someday, right? Right now? Coo-coo again.

~ 6 ~

We received the fewest holiday cards we ever have this year. Now, I can't exactly complain because we didn't send any out either. But every year, I aspire to send out cards, and for the past several, I have failed. I always figured I would jump back on the Card Sending Train when my kids are a little older...so it saddens me that the Card Sending tradition seems to be going the way of railroad travel. I love getting Holiday cards in the mail, reading the letters people write, or even getting the ones that are simply signed. I imagine all those cards criss-crossing through the mail all over the country, weaving hand-written connections between family and friends. Their decline is a loss.

Did you send out cards this year? Did you get many?

~ 7 ~

And, because I can't think of a 7th, I'll throw it out to you. What books are you reading or recommending these days? Teacher Mommy and I discussed books via email this morning (we're so erudite) and she has ordered me to get myself to a bookstore (I'm sure a library would do) to get a copy of Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451. I actually have a pretty intimidating stack of "must reads" right now, but what the heck, let's add to it, shall we? Please suggest a favorite book in the comments, and tell us why you like it.

Also, has anyone read An Exact Replica of a Figment of My Imagination by Elizabeth McCracken? Sounds intriguing. And surprising.

Thanks! And Happy Happy Friday to you all!

* * *

Thank You, Roald

Today, finally, we finished reading aloud Charlie and The Great Glass Elevator.

We started this short book quite awhile ago...and I'm chagrined that I let it go for so long. I wish I could tell you that we have been so busy excelling academically that we just haven't had time for the frivolity of Mr. Wonka, but alas, this would not be true. Instead, our reading together just fell by the wayside, another victim of our chaotic life and my poor planning.

Sometimes, I feel like there is too much going on to make sense of anything.

So imagine my delight, when I arrived at the last page of the book and read the motto that Roald Dahl lived by:

"My candle burns at both ends,

It will not last the night,

But ah my foes and oh my friends

It gives a lovely light."

I am hereby stealing this motto from Mr. Dahl. Today, I will travel through the world with a lovely, crazy, unsustainable but exhilarating light.

* * *

7 Quick Takes: Volume 19, The Reader Participation Edition

...and then I woke up and lo, it was a Friday, and I said: "It is good."

Please visit Jen at Conversion Diary for the original 7 Quick Takes and links to others playing along.

~ 1 ~

Recommended reading for today: Well, I haven’t read this yet, I just heard about it today. But it sure sounds interesting! Our local public radio station produces a daily show called Forum. Today’s guest was Richard Muller, talking about his new book called The Instant Physicist: An Illustrated Guide.

The above image and the publisher’s synopsis below are taken from Powell’s Books website:

Richard A. Muller demonstrated in his recent bestseller, Physics for Future Presidents, that he has a unique talent for delivering the aha moment—making difficult topics accessible. In The Instant Physicist he shows his ability to entertain, too, by presenting the best of the scientific curiosities he has assembled over his distinguished career. Assisted by award-winning cartoonist Joey Manfre, who has created an original color cartoon for each physics bite, Muller will have readers chuckling while they’re absorbing more science than they ever thought possible. From the surprising (chocolate has more energy in it than TNT) to the scary (even kids can make a bomb), this book contains a revelation on every page. Once finished with this page-turner, readers will be the stars of their next cocktail party. The book consists of a color cartoon on each right-hand page and explanatory text on the left.

Sounds awesome, no? I hope to pick up this book sometime this weekend, in between our 6 soccer games and two end-of-season soccer parties. Let me know if you get it too!

What are you reading right now?

~ 2 ~

On Wednesday morning, I was chatting with one of Little T’s preschool teachers, who sweetly called my daughter “delightful,” and I told her that Little T is very proud of herself that she has never gotten in trouble at school. Well, that was the kiss of death. Five short hours later, she can no longer claim that distinction. Right before lunch, she locked herself in the bathroom, preventing several short people—short people in urgent need, no less—from coming in. She proceeded to bang on the walls for no apparent reason, and she stayed in there, despite the teacher’s repeated demands that she open the door.

When she finally came out, she was given a stern talking to and placed in a five minute time out. These were the longest, hardest five minutes of the day for all of the boys at the school, who rely on Little T to chase them around while pretending to be a vampire. They were at a loss without her.

The teacher was laughing about the whole thing by the time I picked up my little Fang Girl at 2pm, but thus endeth any good behavior bragging rights for her.

Those of you with preschoolers who have no such bragging rights, what’d your kid do to get in trouble?

~ 3 ~

Chalk up another trip to the ER for the AIRY-5 Family! Why do things always happen to us on weekends and holidays? This time, Veteran’s Day, so our peds office was closed. Anyway, this trip was for severe poison oak. You might think that a seasoned mom like me wouldn’t make a trip to the ER for something like poison oak. I thought so too, until yesterday.

My 10 year old gets poison oak really badly, and has had it more times than I can count. We’ve always just soldiered through it, with various over the counter remedies. We’ve ended up relying mostly on Benadryl and ice packs for relief, and just gritting our teeth until it clears up. (Yes, “our” teeth. While suffering from poison oak is a terrible, miserable experience, being the mother of a kid with poison oak is almost equally miserable.) We also recently learned about Sticky Monkeyflower as a prophylactic, and since we have tons of this native plant in our garden, we’ve tried it a few times. I think last time he got it, the monkeyflower helped it go away faster than it ever had before. Unfortunately, he didn’t eat any this past Monday before he went hiking for 5.5 hours.

And this time, he got it on his face so badly that both of his eyes and his mouth were swollen and there wasn’t a single unaffected spot anywhere on his face or neck. It was worse than I have ever seen it. On Wednesday, I finally decided to go the steroid route, which I had heretofore opposed. One day in to the dose, he was still going mad with itching. His pediatrician, who I reached by phone even though the office was closed, thought it should have been helping by now and suggested we give him a shot to get him faster relief.

So, off to the ER for us. As it turns out, the doc on duty was a poison oak expert, and she talked me out of the shot. She suggested Zyrtec, A&D ointment, and patience. And to keep taking the steroid prescription we started on Wednesday. The A&D gave him immediate, lasting relief, and finally the steroid seems to be working, as his face is clearer today than it has been since Tuesday.

Poor guy.

What was your last ER trip for? And does anyone out there have a unique poison oak remedy?

~ 4 ~

Never say never. I’ve been thinking about things I let my kids do that I’m sure I thought I never would. Maybe we could start a little “True Confessions” segment, where we admit to one tiny (or not so tiny) parenting choice that we are both surprised we’ve made and maybe a little less than proud of. I’ll go first.

I let my kids – all of my kids – stay up on Monday and Tuesday nights to watch Dancing with the Stars. I am not a big TV fan. I am even less of a reality TV fan. I’m naturally suspicious of popular culture, on aesthetic more than moral grounds. And yet, I let them. Never thought I’d do that, but there ya’ go. What? You think that’s no big deal? Did you think I was going to start off with the big guns? Um, no.

How about you? What will you admit to?

~ 5 ~

What is UP with American Girl Dolls? Why are they so expensive? We have a girl lobbying for one for Christmas. (I curse the catalog that found its way to my mailbox unbidden.) She is also lobbying for a skateboard. She has varied interests.

Someone tell me why I should shell out an insane amount of money for one of those dolls? Are they lined in gold? Do they clean a girl’s bedroom? Do they pay the bills? Do they possess the answer to the meaning of Life Itself? What is UP?

~ 6 ~

A friend of mine posted a question on her Facebook wall recently: What would you attempt to do if you knew you wouldn’t fail? I answered professional competitive dirt biking.

When I was in college, I submitted something to the literary magazine. The editor asked me for a little blurb bio for the contributors’ pages. I told him I couldn’t think of anything and he could put something in for me. Shortly after the magazine came out, people started coming up to me on campus and asking how my dirt biking career was going. Funny guy, that editor.

I’m not serious about the dirt biking, but I have been thinking about what fear of failure might be keeping me from. Writing ranks up there, for sure.

How about you? What would you attempt, if failure were not an issue?

~ 7 ~

Do you spend too much time on the Internet? I do. What’s that all about?

* * *

7 Quick Takes: Volume 18

Can I get a Friday, please? Why thank you!

Please visit Jen at Conversion Diary for the original 7 Quick Takes, and for links to the other folks who are playing along.

~ 1 ~

As posted earlier, we lost a frog this week. This is a mystery. The cover of the terrarium did have a rip in it, but we put a book over the ripped part for a temporary fix, and later some duct tape over the same rip, also temporary. The cover itself was not moved from the position it was left in the night before. Nothing else seemed amiss. But Bella was gone.

Fire-bellied toads are not expensive. After several hours of looking for her, and then facing the fact that she could not have survived so long without water, we hit the local Vivarium and brought home another one. My son christened him "Rice." (The other frog he has is named "Beans," a tribute to the beloved frog pet in Cheaper by the Dozen.)

The sun set on a half-happy, half-mourning 10 year old. Rice proved to be just the ticket to mend a broken heart.

~ 2 ~

Fast forward to the next day. Rice is missing. I kid you not, we have now lost two frogs in two days. We discovered the loss when Dad took the cover off the terrarium to re-cover it in new wire mesh. He placed the 10 year old on guard over the terrarium while he had the cover in the garage. While keeping a watchful eye on the inside of the tank, the boy cried out: "RICE IS GONE!" More searching. More panic. More sadness.

Needless to say, I feel like a most irresponsible pet owner: TWO animals in TWO days? Lost! Neglected! Abandoned!

So. Do we go ahead and get another one? Do we deserve it? Am I sending the right message to my son, that little lives are easily replaced at $7.50 a pop?

The cover is all kinds of secure now, but still...

~ 3 ~

So to recap, somewhere in this house are the sad little remains of TWO fire-bellied toads. Add to that tableaux the following: in the past week, my daughter spilled an entire bag of tortilla chips in my entryway. My other daughter dropped a glass mason jar of homemade applesauce on our front walk. Both of my sons stepped in dog poop in their bare feet (on different days). Yesterday, my four year-old poured orange juice all over the counter while aiming for a cup. Many sheets have been peed upon. While traveling my hardwood floors, I've stepped on legos and sand and pools of water; at least I hope it was water. It was probably water, since we left shallow bowls of water in every room of the house in a vain attempt to catch wayward frogs. We have dog hair in our new modeling clay. There are ants...everywhere. I just discovered a lake of Irish breakfast tea, with milk and sugar, filling up the reservoirs on my old wooden cutting board. Life is messy.

Wanna come over?

~ 4 ~

Delightful homeschooling activity: Reading aloud. When I finish this post, I'm off to read to the kids from Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, by Roald Dahl. We've done some reading aloud in the past, but much more now that we are homeschooling. One of the best things reading aloud does for me is to make me slow down. There is no way to read out loud quickly. Well, I suppose you can, but you ruin the story if you do that.

Time slows down, children grow magically quiet as they listen, good stories fill the air. So today's recommended reading is: Anything read aloud.

~ 5 ~

My son just told me: "Man, parents these days worry way too much about the things their kids do."

I'll be adding that to my list of Things To Remind My Kids About When They Become Parents.

~ 6 ~

It's that time of year again, when I vow to do the Holidays right, avoid stress, celebrate Advent, keep things in perspective, spend wisely, and resist the prevailing consumerist culture.

Without fail, I fail.

I always get overwhelmed and stressed out.

I take it as a sign of hope that I stand here before you, on the brink of the Holiday season, and vow once more to Fight the Good Fight.

How do you maintain sanity during the holidays?

~ 7 ~

Halloween has come and gone, and I didn't even manage to get pictures of everyone in their costumes. As usual, we've had a candy-filled week, some of it acquired legitimately, much of it pilfered behind my back. Halloween always reminds me of the greatest candy-sneaker of them all, Lady E. So for my 7th Quick Take, I am posting two links from Halloween 2007; these stories make us laugh every time we tell them. Enjoy!

* * *