07 May 2010

Boldly Going

Today, I am attempting the impossible.

I am stepping into the abyss, taking on the dark side, engaging the forces of chaos.

I will go forth and conquer, and I will not falter.

Today, I am going to help my kids clean their rooms without losing my mind or my voice.

Wish me luck; it's never been done before. If I am successful, I shall mark the calendar and celebrate the anniversary of this day every year with much dancing and rejoicing.

I will not yell. I will not yell. I will not yell. I will not yell. I will not yell.

Five vows for not yelling. Five, because I got five, and also because five is a Fibonacci number. I'm invoking the natural order of things to keep myself from yelling.

Today, I will be one mother, cleaning two rooms, with three cups of coffee on board, for five children; I will serve dinner for eight people (MIL is visiting), I will break up thirteen arguments, I will kiss my kids twenty-one times. Each. I will remind myself to breathe thirty-four times.

And I will not yell.

* * *

5 comments:

Teacher Mommy said...

Um. Good luck with that. Really.

Oy.

nicole said...

how did it go?

Homemaker Man said...

Did you do it?

wifemotherexpletive said...

i'm in love with fibonacci... and hope you got all those kisses in before you threw in the one towel, or three towels... :)

Monica said...

OK, people, mark the calendars. May 7th, 2010 will henceforth be known as The Day My Kids Cleaned Their Rooms, With My Help, During Which I Did Not Yell.

It was beautiful. Thank you Fibonacci.

The weirdest part is that it was almost easy. The rooms didn't get done perfectly, but they did look nice enough that I wasn't cringing when we had guests for a party the next day. The only problem is that now I have no excuse for all that yelling I do on the other 364 days of the year...