05 July 2010

Paying it Forward

Picture three daughters sandwiched together on the back row of the minivan (hall of hell, is what I call it). Daughter A is walloping on Daughter B, who is stuck in the middle. Daughter B is getting upset, starting to whimper and protest.

Pan camera to the front of the car, where dad is driving and monitoring the situation through the rear view mirror. Mom is leaning her forehead against her hand, hoping the noise stops soon and knowing that it won't.

The fateful words from dad: "Don't let her do that to you, Daughter B. If you don't like being hit, hit back!"

Mom cringes, waiting for the inevitable epic fail this advice will yield.

Sure enough, a loud wail erupts from the back seat, adding to Daughter B's now continuous cries of distress.

Dad: "Don't hit Daughter C! Daughter A was the one hurting you, why did you slug Daughter C!?!?!?

* * *

I knew it would end badly. I just didn't know it would end up expanding outward to involve ever more family members.

* * *

The scene fades as the minivan trundles down the highway to a soundtrack of wailing girls.

* * *

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